My masculinity has been at the core of my identity as long as I can remember, and I enjoy the freedom to wear the clothes that make me feel good. When I was a child, I had to wear dresses and long hair like my younger sisters. It was such a relief when my parents finally gave up, sent me to the hairdresser to get my hair cut short, and bought me a pair of jeans.
I grew up as a tomboy in a small conservative town in southern Germany and I moved to West Berlin in my early twenties. At that time Berlin was still divided by a wall. Though I struggled to make peace with my female body when I was younger, I'm glad I was not born a man.
I'm so thankful for my friends and lovers who have taught me to see myself the unconditionally loving way they did. They stood up for me, spoke out for me and took care of me whenever the world saw me as an alien that was not normal.
When it comes to gender labels, I guess the tag "queer butch" probably fits me best. But my gender has always felt fluid. When I started to dance Argentine tango it felt only natural for me to lead, but now I also enjoy following. The best thing is to flow with changing roles during the dance.
Being able to embrace my female traits as much as my male qualities has given me inner peace. I consider myself as to be a twospirits human being, and it feels good to live the best of both worlds.
I'm feeling blessed to be born in a country where I don't have to hide myself just to survive, and I'm glad to work for a company that values the diversity of its employees.